From Trauma to Triumph: Overcoming Anorexia and PTSD.
TRIGGER WARNINGS: Near-death Experience, Trauma, Nightmares, Eating Disorder (Anorexia), Suicidal Thoughts, PTSD, Hospitalization, Immigration Stress, Undiagnosed Mental Health Issues, Mental Health Stigma
My name is Parisa, and I’m currently a fourth-year psychology student at UBC. My experiences with mental illnesses have taught me invaluable lessons. I would like to share my journey with others here, hoping this story inspires them to speak out to avoid future consequences. I
I am originally from Iran where I finished a master’s program in Chemical Engineering from an accredited university. Before immigrating to Canada, in 1997 a significant event occurred that changed my life forever. I found myself on the brink of death but miraculously survived. Life after the incident was incredibly challenging. Adjusting to life while feeling helpless and struggling with overwhelming sadness and despair along with traumatic nightmares was difficult. I became irritable, had negative thoughts, and started avoiding many social interactions. Unfortunately, the focus was more on my physical health, and my deteriorating mental health went unnoticed.
Meanwhile, my husband was applying for immigration to Canada which was a challenging process for me both emotionally and physically. Amidst these struggles, I developed a severe eating disorder, causing me to lose a significant amount of weight and adapt to unhealthy habits. The combination of my trauma and eating disorder put me in a very dangerous situation with recurrent thoughts of suicide.
Despite seeking help from various doctors, my condition remained undiagnosed until a specialist diagnosed me with both PTSD and Anorexia and had me hospitalized, though it was not a specialized facility for eating disorders. The experience was frightening, and I spent 45 days in a mental hospital without proper care for my condition. Around this time, we received the unexpected news of our approval for immigration to Canada. However, the prospect of such a significant move while still battling with my issues was overwhelming. My only hope was to continue my education, something that could keep me moving forward.
Nevertheless, we made the move to Canada, and soon after, I was referred to a psychiatrist and started a proper treatment. Additionally, I received admission to a Ph.D. program in the Chemical Engineering department at UBC, although my studies were challenged by my ongoing health struggles. Despite my best efforts, my eating disorder resurfaced, leading to another hospitalization. Following this, I decided to halt my studies without consulting with my supervisor or any other person. I was afraid and ashamed of talking to someone about my problem. Therefore, I made the worst decision in my life, something that I regret to this date. I often wonder if things would have turned out differently had I received the appropriate support earlier.
I entered the workforce and worked in various industries for several years but there remained a sense of incompleteness within me. With a renewed sense of determination, I aspire to return to academia. I asked my previous supervisors to help me finish my Ph.D. but I was refused because of my age. Although it was upsetting, I was determined to pursue a degree. Eventually, I decided to study psychology to better understand myself and assist others facing similar challenges. I am proud of myself for being able to complete three years with a GPA of 87%.
If I dared to talk to my supervisors while in the Ph.D. program, things might have been different now. I could have been a faculty member instead of a student, a thought that never leaves me. I highly encourage those who struggle with mental health to get professional help before getting too late.
